This Week’s Winners: It’s Easier to go to Jail Than You Think!

  1. The University of Maryland at College Park student who leveled threats via email. He was charged for the threats, but then admitted to the hospital for a psych eval. Well, he’s been released from the hospital, and he’s been sacked with an additional charge – the misuse of email. (I bet you didn’t know that was a crime. It’s a stupid crime to commit. Use some common sense, people. Hey, hey, you—get off that Twitter. Writing that crap. Yah dummy!)
  2. Another alleged dummy writing anti-Semitic slurs in a Maryland University elevator. (You got all the way to college and you didn’t learn (1.) not to write on the wall; and (2.) Your writing utensils are for jotting down class notes, and writing your homework papers and assignment drafts? (The police are looking for you, alleged Dummy.)
  3. DUI ramming into a Seven-Eleven—with his SUV. He narrowly missed a young woman purchasing a lottery ticket (both times: when he crashed into the store, then skidded out on the fearful run). Young lady, you’re already blessed. May God continue to be with you. DUI-guy, you’re blessed, too. You get to live the rest of your life not in remorse and shame for killing an innocent person with your frivolous non-thinking actions.
  4. Somebody arrest that Tornado in Dallas, Texas that threw around those trucks like Tonker Toys! (I’m just sayin’.)
  5. California teacher makes headlines when he leaves his family to play hide-and-seek with an 18-year-old student; then gets arrested when it’s discovered that he had an inappropriate relationship with an even younger student. Allegedly he dipped his wick in an even younger student age pool. (C’mon man, leave the kiddies alone. Go play with someone your own age and size—at least appropriate.)
  6. Air Traffic Controller mistakes pilot’s distress call for a prank. He didn’t hear all the identification numbers like he should have, the report said because perhaps he was distracted (i.e. hadn’t devoted his total attention to the task at-hand.) [Charges may be filed. Funny (not) what can land you in hot water when you’re not paying attention. Especially when lives are at stake.]
  7. Four Fairview, Illinois women beat down a waitress in a restaurant because reportedly, she messed up an/their order. (Really? When I’m that hungry, I just swing past the drive-thru. No sittin’ down and waitin’ for me. Seriously, you need to take that aggression around the world! Beat the Hell outta some injustices. Some shhhhh..t like that!)
  8. To the woman who tried to smuggled drugs by sewing them in the wig…See where all that misplaced ingenuity got you? Now go figure out something that can help get us to world peace or something. And at the very least, woman, buy a better-looking wig!
  9. State Department Employee, one who passed all the bells and whistles of security checks and so on, arrested for pornography. Not the first; and sadly not the last. (Just stop it. Stop it, now!)

The sad thing about mistakes, stupidity and gall (especially all of the aforementioned when you can’t take it back), and misguided judgment (in case I wasn’t clear) is that these acts have no respect of person! Believe me, I know that, too (not the porn thing)! Been-there-done-that/Don’t-want-the-T-shirt!


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