This Week’s Winners: It’s Easier to go to Jail Than You Think!

  1. Swimsuit model accused of drug dealing, arrested in Australia (Jumping bail by accident, I think she said.)
  2. Funeral guy molesting a dead body (No comment)
  3. Nigerian lady smuggling heroin inside her belly/stomach (Pepto, anyone?)
  4. Lady jailed for jaywalking (Here’s a tip: never smart-mouth a cop [excuse me, police officer], especially if you’re in the wrong—ever-so-slightly or ever-so-ever)
  5. Fish store guy downgraded from a felony to a misdemeanor for selling endangered fish in Virginia (Good law/Bad Law – something’s fishy. [I like fried fish, though.])
  6. The School bus stealer (led the police on a chase – and not an O.J. chase)
  7. Florida Millionaire charge with DUI manslaughter, also for leaving the scene without calling for help. (You’re above the law, and a personal concern for your fellow human being, really?)
  8. Whitney’s ex-hubby,  for talking on his cell phone, while driving, and a little tipsy (Oh Lordy)
  9. Girl, for a shooting at Ihop. (Why?)
  10. The Blonde bank robber or maybe they’re calling her the Blonde Bandit (Bonnie, is that you, girrrrrl? [I like “blond with an ‘e’. My black, without.])
  11. A parent beating up on a High School student because of a food fight. Think the Father’s daughter is going down, too. (Smile for the camera!)
  12. Disrupting the Pope’s visit (something about down with the revolution or up with the revolution—something. Either way, he won’t be there)
  13. Funny girl during a Rick Santorum campaign stop on the shooting range. Her joke voiced a threat toward the President. Last check the Feds didn’t laugh and they’re looking for her. (Let’s have some respect and decorum, huh. Is no one minding their manners anymore?)
  14. Policeman, irate in a restaurant because his chicken nuggets were under cooked. (uh oh. You ever had a day where you just couldn’t take, not one more thing? Well, go’head, take it. Then go home and take a nap.)
  15. The woman who lied and said she was crazy—that’s why she couldn’t do jury duty. Then she bragged about it on a radio show. The judge was listening. Now, she says she really is crazy. (Ooh, wait, did the jury come in on that? Last check, the Judge wasn’t buyin’ it.)
  16. Batman got pulled over in his Lamborghini for not having any license plates on his car. (But I think the police were too stunned to arrest him. He was close, though—like the time I got into argument at the car dealers.)


      I could go on and on, but I’ll stop right there. Of course, I consider these examples serious and scary, and I’m not judging (‘cause that’s really scary, and dangerous).

I’m just sayin’ don’t get so uppity about going to jail/prison—‘cause the crime’s not different just because it was you! Know-what-I’m-sayin’? 

So slow your roll, think stuff over. Anger, hurt, misunderstandings—out-of-control, and snap emotional decisions can land you in strange consequences.  And remember—there, but for the grace of God; go I. Sadly, I’ve been there, too, and I was given grace. Whew! (I’m still living and learning.)

If you think you’re slick, why don’t you get slick enough to use your slickness for good, not evil. The ultimate return is much greater. Together, let us live to change a heart and a mindset for the good of mankind, from the inside out. That’s my goal, and the mission of The Prison Plumb Line.